A.A.A.A.A.A.A.Z.

She needs Wolf power or she will explode in a shower of pulped yams. Please help me and A.A.A.A.A.A.A.Z. get Karla’s trunk out of her guts.

At first glance, you might think that you’re looking at a monkey getting shot in the head. And you’d be right. That’s exactly what it is. Now, despite what you might be thinking, this isn’t a direct replication lifted from the ‘Animals‘ episode of Brass Eye, though it is close. The basic concept is there but the logo looks pretty rubbish in the show. I suspect that that’s the point. As well as the aforementioned monkey, we’ve got some bars signifying a zoo and (what looks to be) the Impact font from the original design being retained to bring Against Animal Anger and Autocasual Abuse Atrocities in Zoos into the modern age.

The organisation is a subsidiary of W.O.F.D.C.A.P (the World Organisation For Decreasing Captive Animal Problems) and put bluntly, always makes me laugh. The whole series is littered with ridiculous sounding acronyms that somehow manage to dupe celebrities into believing they are legitimate. We’ve seen HOECS Games already here but there are plenty more available: F.U.K.D, B.O.M.B.D, G.E.F.A.F.W.I.S.P and so on.

A.A.A.A.A.A.A.Z. manages to catch out Britt Ekland (model Swede), Alexandra Paul (Baywatch slo-mo lifeguard), Jilly Cooper (author of horseshit), Wolf (mulletted, barely-literate spandex twat) and Paul Daniels (wide-headed, dead, poisonous Tory dwarf magician) by telling them Karla the elephant has got her trunk stuck up her anus due to being in a zoo, somehow. In the end, the head is removed and has shrunk to human size and is white and smooth.

Given all of that, it’s still utterly mind-blowing that none of them twig (Karla is an East German elephant, as an example). In modern parlance, it might be called ‘virtue signalling’. The way they’re all so desperate to make it look like they care but can’t be arsed to do any background checks about it. The only two issues with that is that virtue signalling didn’t exist in 1997 and people who say it to describe others are usually horrible bastards.

I bet Wolf from Gladiators to this day doesn’t get that none of it was real.