Colworth Manor High School

She was clever, like, brainbox clever. Zero social skills. She had this mad hair. Always scribbling these weird little diagrams of computers that she wanted to build.

We’re doubling up on the black for this one, what with the literal translation of ‘bête noire’ being ‘black beast’. A reference in English to a thing or person you detest. And in this case it’s supernerd Verity Greene despising her old school friend Maria. The latter starting a rumour about the former wanking an IT teacher off in the computer room, thereby resulting in the nickname ‘milkmaid’ sticking with her for the entire duration of school life. Classic bullying. Without going into too much detail, Verity ends up building a supercomputer that traverses realities to the point that she can manipulate any part of history to suit any given situation. Having become everything ever, she eventually resorts to executing her prior classmates for ruining her life. Lovely stuff.

As an aside, they work for a food production company called Ditta (manufacturer of Honey Nugs, if you’re interested), but that logo is so prominent, we can’t replicate that as it’s just too obvious. However, what is partially visible on an old Facebook post is their old school badge. It’s very small and you can’t really make all of it out, so I’ve done my best with what I’ve got and filled in the blanks somewhat. We’ve got a circular graphic which appears to have some wreathwork and then some icons; a building, a book, a tree and some kind of dancing human figure. All fairly conventional school semiotics, you’d have to say.

The text along the bottom of the badge is practically illegible, so I’ve gone a bit rogue with Latin for that. Schools still do mottos, right? Well, this one reads ‘Capillos Ancillae Lactis Vide’. Posh, single-sex school goers might be able to work out that this roughly translates to ‘look at milkmaid’s hair!’ – a derogatory comment made by Maria’s friend Natalie back in the day.

Sure, you can say that no school on Earth would be entertaining this idea but in a world where a woman’s erasing nut allergies from existence with a quantum compiler I’m saying they would.